Monday, September 29, 2008

Hiatus

I feel like I've come a long way lately. I've read a lot of good inspirational stuff lately that seems to have helped my mindset. I'll share a few.

Many of lifes failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up. - Thomas Alva Edison

Then at the summer commencement at BYU, (were you listening Brooke and Shawn?), Richard G. Scott said, "Radiate a positive attitude. Let your attitude be that of continuing happiness. The challenges you face, the growth experiences you encounter, should be like temporary scenes played out on the stage of continuing peace and hapiness. Challenges are not intended to be the substance of life."

It's been a good reminder for me. Sometimes I feel like I have to learn to be happy.

Anyhow, having said that, I'm going on a little blogging hiatus. I will say that I have never written for anyone. I write to journal, I write whatever comes into my head, and I write to amuse myself with those thoughts. I don't write for anyone else, and therefore I don't expect to please anyone else.

But I think I have to take a break for a while to remind myself of that. It's been extremely therapeutic over the last few months and has really been my social outlet - thanks to you guys who comment and keep up our friendships through blogging. But I find my self esteem starting to get wrapped up in this. No comments? Only a couple of comments? That must have been a dumb one. Is anyone even listening? I guess you make yourself pretty vulnerable when you put it all out there. So recently, when I've had my feelings hurt by catching some flack for my lack of mothering skills I've demonstrated on here and then an anonymous commenter made me want to cry (don't worry, I erased it), I realized I just need a break. I must be getting too into this, and that was never my intent. So anonymous commenter, go find another blogger in a fragile hormonal condition to harass (and own up to it, huh). I still refuse to go private. I'll come back, don't worry. Just taking a break. Probably a good time too. My little babysitter just quit (ok, not a big deal since she's only been able to come 2 or 3 hours a week anyway since school started). But maybe I can invest some time in some other important ventures. Like I could join a Stephenie Meyer fan club or something. Hand-make my own werewolf costume to wear to the "Twilight" premiere.

Oh well, probably will improve my neglectful mothering anyway. :)

Don't worry, I probably won't be able to stay away very long. I'm kind of an addict.

41 comments:

Tennille said...

No! You have no idea how much I look forward to your posts! Your honesty and ability to find humor in your life is so refreshing and helps me get through this crazy time in my life. Please don't take a hiatus! Or if you do, can you still e-mail me humorous tales of your life? :)

Goeb Life said...

Hi Jen,

I never comment because I didn't know how you felt about people other than close friends and family reading your blog. I LOVE your blog! You say what I think, you are so brave and humble. I really learn so much from reading your thoughts and seeing your suggestions. I even follow another of your friend's blogs because of some of the links that you have posted. I have your blog in my google reader so it pops up when you post. I hop right to reading it! You need to do what you think is best for you and your family, but know you have been a great read and inspiration for me. Thank you. Can't wait to get back on the blogging band wagon!

Jenna Goeb (Melanie's friend)

P.S. You even inspired me to start my own blog.

Jen I said...

Hey Jenna! Good to hear from you. I don't mind anyone reading my blog. The more the merrier. I'll have to check out your blog.

Angela said...

I know what you mean about getting wrapped up in it--it is so nice to be validated by lots of readers who enjoy your writing (which, of course, everyone enjoys yours), and it can be a bummer when people don't comment. I can see why you would need a break now and then. I'll look forward to your return!

I loved that quote by Richard G. Scott about viewing trials in life as temporary scenes in a play. So refreshing! It is easy to view this whole life as a "test," and view only the good times as those scenes in a play that will soon be over. I guess the glass can either be half full or half empty depending on your point of view.

Whoops! My soup is getting burned. . . .

Laura B. said...

Hurry back!

Julie said...

You can't leave! You say what I feel, and I love reading it! I too get caught up in people commenting, it makes you feel good, especially when in a new place and still having hardly any friends (at least in my situation). So don't leave!

And, I was ROFL about the sheet. We have no problems in the pregnancy department, and so my husband and I were just dying! Thanks for posting that!

Safire said...

Come back soon! I've enjoyed reading about your family because you have kids in similar ages/stages to mine. It's like having someone I "know" going through some of the same stuff. I know the feeling for needing a break but come back soon please! :)

Gavin and Shawna McEwan said...

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO....I will be the saddest blogger alive if you take more than a day break. You are the ONLY consistant blogger I read. I am always cracking up at the computer to a confused and amused husband who thinks we are all a little nuts for the things we share with the world...And I LOVE IT!!! I feel like its the only way I get to stay in touch with our long lost friends that we have made through our travels.
Crap on who ever made you feel less than the genius fertile woman you are! SHAME!!

Ty and Trista Swartzlander said...

You are such an awesome gal. You do what you have to do, but don't forget that you rock. That handmade costume better be sweet. Let's take up walking on the beach. Get that stroller.

Anonymous said...

Oh, no! You cannot stop for long. Even your mother needs this contact with you. I love you and admire you and am always dying to see photos of the babies and Cash, and hear the goings on of your family. You need to keep up this journaling.

xoxocyh

Corinne said...

LAME times. Just at family dinner last night I told the story about the guy jumping over a fence with a tv. That's hilarious. Seriously, your blog rocks.

Tyler Jorgenson said...

Well, enjoy your hiatus.

Just remind the anonymous poster what happens in Miami when one is just standing around minding their own business.

Krista said...

I love comments too, so you are not alone. it is addicting, and plus to make you feel better, I am always jealous to see 9 to 12 comments on everyone of your posts. You know how to blog, you can bring smiles to everyone that reads it, actually you bring laughter in my home. So keep blogging.
By the way your twins are getting so big, I am missing that stage you are in, believe it or not.

Melanie said...

Hey Jen!
Im new to this blogging thing but I totally understand your need for others to reach out and converse with you through comments. We are social beings! Not Islands! So you need not feel bad about your need for people to respond. I totally get that and will admit that Im guilty of indulging in your wonderful blog without posting comments. I had no idea but feel like "duh!" of course she wants to hear from us too! I love that you voiced your concerns (you have great insight). Just another wonderful example of your honesty. May I also mention how brave you are to share with people! So screw anonymous! Some grouch trying to cut you down. Take all the time you need on your hiatus but you will be missed! I check your blog everyday and have never been disappointed! The breast pump picture was
HIL.LAR.I.OUS. Jed and I both had a good laugh over the stories from Ryan. We will be waiting to hear from you!

Preston and Rachel said...

Hi Jen, I just wanted to let you know that I am one of your regular blog readers, and I love your blog. You told me how to blog-stock my way to your blog one time when I did your hair and I have been reading it ever since then. I have been meaning to leave a comment (so that I can feel more like a friend and less like a creepy blog-stalker)but I'll be honest I always tell myself that I'll leave a comment one of these days when I'm not so tired, but that day is never giong to come. Anyway, I look forward to seeing more entries whenever they come and feel free to look at my blog (that would help me to feel even less like a blog-stalker). The address is prestonandrachel.blogspot.com

liz said...

aw. i like your writing humor and reality posts. I will miss them. but will still check in.

i have had similar feelings and then took time off and had crap posts that were less person. then i hated how i changed for others and tried to get back into the thoughts of writing like no one else is reading so it's more 'pure' thought and self. it's hard to do. blogging is a funny thing that way.

Carol said...

I had lunch with your sis, Julie last week & I told her how much I enjoy your blogs & how I just sit & laugh & look forward to the next one! I read my daughter's blog (Jen Howick) & then go immediately to yours. Don't stay away too long, OK? You're a ray of sunshine! I told Julie that you should be published. Thanks for all the chuckles!

Julie said...

Hey Jen,

I often don't leave comments for fear others will think they are stupid. Like this. . . .I am actually crying right now. . . duh it's not like you won't be my sister or anything, even if you don't blog. But I'm just sad. Sad someone made you feel bad. Just went back to make sure it wasn't me that was deleted. Like maybe I shouldn't have put how I come to your blogs when I'm down. But seriously just the other day I did for a pick me up. Is that selfish or what? So why am I crying? I don't know. I'll just miss all the pictures and the pick me ups but like I said it's not like I don't know how to reach you and we'll always be family!!!!

I'm glad you voiced what you were feeling. None of us had any idea!!! This is seriously the best blog.

Julie

Anne Marie said...

I absolutely LOVE your honesty throughout your blog, and I love your honesty about your experiences with blogging. I too have found myself sucked up into the blogging world...I think way too much about what everyone thinks when I write about myself and my weaknesses, I think way too much about how many or how few comments there are, and then I can dissect any of the comments and wonder if there is some hidden meaning in what someone's said. I am so sorry that someone left an offensive comment on your blog. So rude! It's so hard to let go of things like that. I understand if you need to take a break. I've been wondering about doing the same for myself. But it's so hard to be a SAHM and live in this isolated universe so much of the day. Blogging somehow gives us something to think about, something to look forward to, but I have found myself becoming way too dependent on the feedback I get. Maybe I can find some happy medium...maybe just checking my blog less. I seriously think you could make your posts into a book one day...you really have a gift for writing and finding the humor in crazy situations. Other moms can relate to you. Your life is absolutely, insanely difficult right now! Twins is enough to put someone through hell for a few years, let alone if you have a toddler, husband gone a lot, and a new place to figure out. I'm just glad you're honest enough to write about the beauty and the ugliness of it all. I know you might need a break, but I think it's therapeutic for many of us to read about someone who makes their blog REAL.

Sarah Starr said...

Breaks can be good, vacations, rest, if you feel you need it, take it. With SO MUCH out there, it is easy to get blogged down.

Aloha_Misty said...

Jen I will really miss your blogging. I feel like it is a perfect description of how difficult motherhood could be and I am inspired by what and how you deal with lives challenges. My mother and I often laugh and talk about your posts and handsome boys!

todd & nicole said...

Don't stay away too long. We love reading your blog. Hope things are going well with Ryan's crazy schedule. Keep us posted on what is going on with your little family.

Kimi said...

Jen, I feel ya on the hiatus. Two people offended me on my blog, luckily your offender was a stranger, mine on the other hand was my sister and sister-in-law. I'm gonna dump sludge in their toilets. Enjoy your break. Maybe Ryan can post until you start again.

Judy said...

Please don't go for too long! I love reading your blog! It's fun to read your witty comments and I'm impressed by you and also glad you're not perfect! I hope you're well and I've really enjoyed reading about your life and your adorable children.

Judy Hunsaker

Jen said...

Jen we LOVE your blog! I'm so entertained each time I read. You're amazing. I'm impressed with all that you do as a mother. I love that you write about the every-day life of being a mother. Those of us other mothers love it especially because we understand (at least in part!). That is how life goes with kids.

I love your comments on our blog. I'll try to do better leaving comments :)

Some anonymous reader needs a serious kick in the pants - and needs to try being in your shoes for a while. Bozo.

Rachel said...

Jen! I love you and I love your blog and I love your "mothering" and I want to grow up to be like you someday.

Over the weekend I was talking to President Dranger or something-or-other from the mission presidency out here, and he says that he and his family love you, too.

Don't stay away long. We are all reading and waiting and hoping...

Rachel

nyclizzie said...

Who is your publicist?! This is a great publicity stunt! LOL

I have so many things I want to say right now, but I keep erasing and retyping....hmmmm...basically, you can't give up what you love and what other people LOVE over ONE anon. comment! Are you going to let the terrorist win?! No way. Take a break if you will, but do what you want, it's your life and life's too short to let this someone take up real estate in your mind. Don't give them another thought! I don't know what the comment was about, but I can only imagine that maybe it didn't come from a fellow mother who has lived the daily grind of keeping many hats on all while keeping about 47 balls juggled in the air at the same time. Motherhood is hard, ungraceful, rewarding at times and yet it's just plain tough. Glad you find the humor in all of it and you have such a gift to share it with the rest of us! Rock on, Jen!

Laurie Jones said...

No Jen! You can't take a break (well only if you really want to), but who is going to make me (and my sisters) laugh everyday? I will seriously miss your posts. But, I know what you mean about getting a little to wrapped up in all this. Isn't it a great way to relieve stress and make the day a little more humorous by blogging?

If you do go away for a little while, come back!!

Tara said...

Hey Jen - This is Tara from playgroup. I have loved reading your blog since I found it on Trista's blog. Having also moved to Miami recently I have found all your Miami post so funny. Lets just say I get it. Anyway- you need to keep me entertained. Hope things are going a little smoother for you. We need to get together sometime!

Anonymous said...

hi Jen, I don't know if you know I read your blog pretty regularly, but I do. I am one of Lejeune's granddaughters, Katya. I love reading the funny blogs and love seeing the pictures of your cute babies and Cash.

AnnaMarie Ferrell said...

I hope you're too obsessed to stay away long. Just know that Tyler & I are checking it everyday! :) Miss hanging out with you! I think of you and Cash every time I see those smiley face potatoes at the store!

Hunnygrams said...

I can see your dad with his mischievious grin and the twinkle in his eye as I read your blogs.
That quirky, witty sense of humor and way of dealing with your current challenges has to be part of his gift to you.
Hope your hiatus is short, but do what is best for YOU. So many people are so quick to judge -- we all have our own way of coping, and obviously yours is therapeutic and enjoyable to many.
I lurke, but don't post, but somedays reading your blogs is one of the high spots of my day. it is a gift to be so candid and gives us a chance to laugh a little, commiserate a lot (especially for those who have had twins or kids close in age.)
You go girl!!!
Aunt Elaine

Anonymous said...

hi jen......we love your blog!!!!!
it is so fun to read..please don't STOP....you are a very talented person and a GREAT mom. don't let one bad apple ruin it for others.Keep smiling,keep blogging,keep being a good mom & wife and everyting else you do!!!!!
love, the girls from peds surgery @ primary children medical center--love deb & pam

Chadlee said...

I hope you come back soon after the Blog Detox. I love your blog and appreciate that you post often. At least by Halloween so we can see the boys in their costumes.

Ty and Trista Swartzlander said...

I didn't think you would really stick with it. Fine! take your time off but know that you are very missed.

Anonymous said...

Jen and Ryan:

You are both capable, nurturing, naturally good, creative, smart, wonderful parents, and don't you forget it!

xoxocyh

Heather said...

Jen, first of all I see way more people comment on your posts than anyone else's blogs. I think you write so honestly and amusingly. I know when I went back to Utah, I was surprised how many people commented on how they enjoyed my blog. Lots of people read, but a lot of times very few people comment. I wouldn't take that personally. Everyone loves you!! Excited to see you guys next weekend.

Lofgrens said...

I have to say, your blog is so refreshing. At times, I wonder if I should not make our lives look so perfect. But I blog to scrapbook. This is my way of recording our memories and to keep in touch with family (mostly) and also friends! Thank you for the words of Richard G. Scott. They are very inspirational and something I needed to hear too. Thanks, and don't get bogged down by one person's rude comments - because there are ALOT of people that love and admire you!!!!

Gavin and Shawna McEwan said...

Come back PLEASE!!Blogging just isnt the same...

Shannon said...

YAH Jenn! people like your blog.

Anonymous said...

I check your blog morning, noon and night, and sometimes in between....often at 3 am when I can't sleep. Not only are you a gifted writer but you also have clever commenters. Some of our lives appear a a bit dull compared to yours. But I'm just so grateful for what you have written in the past because while you're on hiatus I can go way back and read things that you wrote way before I even started to read your blog and they are great too.
You could write a book just on hair products and I love that too. I'll welcome you back when you're ready. It saves me money buying Prozac. Love, Aunt Sharon
ps. Happy Birthday Uncle David, it's past midnight