Wednesday, August 4, 2010

My poor innocent little boy

Since school will start soon for Cash and I realize it's the first time he's really going to be out of my control and dealing with lots of new people, school pick-ups, etc., I decided we had better do a family home evening lesson on stranger danger. I had thought about it for a while and how I really hated to do it.  Cash doesn't yet really know there are bad people in the world.  It was breaking my heart just thinking about telling him. Plus he's finally gotten out of his shell enough to say hi to people as we pass - frequently as, "Hi, man!" and then promptly turns to proudly yell to me that he just said hi to that man. I love it. But he doesn't have a lot of fears yet - probably because he's the oldest child and lives a fairly sheltered life. So I was really torn that I didn't want to put ideas in his head to worry him, but I knew it would be important because he just doesn't know. I can't even get him to pretend something that's not true to his brothers - like when they're going to take a nap and he's saying how he's going to stay awake and I try to get him to not say that to them and act like it's naptime - he's totally bewildered because he doesn't even understand lying.

So we had our stranger danger lesson. And the poor kid was in tears by the end.

We went over the idea of strangers after looking at pictures of family and friends and then random people - mostly celebrities from trash magazines since that's all I had (although, shoot, I'd probably get into a car if David Beckham was motioning to me....) Anyway, then we started talking about different scenarios. I mean, I know it was necessary because during the first few we would have a stranger asking him to come over to his car to help him with something he was like, "Sure!"  So then we did some scenarios where he and I would be walking into a store and Ryan, playing a stranger, would motion to him and then try to lead him away by the hand. It was upsetting to him. But I wanted to get one more point across that if someone took him away he should yell as loud as he could, so we did it again and Ryan tried to carry him off and Cash was just bawling and bawling about how he didn't want people to take him away from us and he didn't want to lose mommy, and on and on.  It was so sad!  I know it was good that he got the point, but man, why does the world have to be the way it is??  Why can't my poor little boy just go on being innocent?  I think we were all a little traumatized by it.

Anyhow, in other news, today was the first of a long 5 days without Ryan while he is at a conference in Dallas. It involved me trying to do more outings than normal with the kids, a bevy of meltdowns by everyone, including me, and having to take all my kids late at night to the church with me that resulted in both a pee accident and a diarrhea accident that I had to clean up at the church. Man is it going to be a long week or what.

10 comments:

Julie said...

Oh boy! That is rough! My friend and I were just talking about "real life" and sharing it with our boys. Sometimes I don't think I do a very good job of it, but it's better they learn and hear from us, and are prepared.

When does school start for Cash!

Julie

Tyler Jorgenson said...

Just to clarify, was the pee or diarrhea accident you or the boys?

AnnaMarie Ferrell said...

That post made me anxious! I wish we didn't have to teach our kids that stuff, too. But we do, so good job. And good luck without Ryan. I usually skip naps so it's an earlier bedtime...but sometimes that backfires.

Anonymous said...

Long week is right! But this, too, will pass away. Good luck.

xoxocyh

Melanie said...

I know what you mean about teaching kids but also freaking them out.. I was in a store that was pretty empty. H wanted to look at toys and I wanted to look at my stuff. I told him he could look at toys and that I would just be a few aisles away. I told him if a stranger made him feel scared to run away and yell "MOM!" Not one minute after we separated I hear..."MOM!!!" and he comes running towards me. He was so upset he could barely squeak out what happened. After a few minutes I got the story out of him. A store clerk asked him if he was lost and he came running. So he did the right thing but then I felt bad that he had to be upset. I also thought about that boy that was lost in the woods and heard the search team calling his name. He hid and didnt call out cause he was told never to talk to strangers. Sheesshhh....

Anonymous said...

Let me tell you from personal experience: getting into a car with David Beckham is not as much fun as it might seem. I mean that.


-"stranger" on the 5th floor.

Anonymous said...

This lesson would never have occurred to me. Once again, you have shown me the way to being a better mom. Thank you!

H. said...

Ah man. That's so hard--both the week without hubby AND teaching the kiddos about reality. We had an FHE on stranger danger and my second kiddo was seriously in tears too. We tried not to make it too traumatic and we used puppets and such, but it's especially hard for those sensitive ones. Can't wait til we don't live in that kind of world.

Shannon said...

I know what you mean. So hard to have to teach them about the bad guys. Preston has never ending questions about the bad guys.
By the way the poop and pee accidents last a Loooooooooonnnnnnnnngggggggggggggg
time. The boys have reverted back to me wiping the bum, AGAIN.
Enjoy Jen Enjoy! or how about Joy in the journey, hah.

Safire said...

You know, the Berenstein Bears have a good book on Stranger Danger. And good luck this week!